I do not feel ready to go home. It's an emotionally overwhelming feeling I can't describe. I just read a few words of my mom's email and just cried. It's not at all what I expected it would be. When a missionary has 2-6 months in the mission he or she thinks, "I can't wait for that day! It will be so cool to finally get to go home!" These are the most difficult emotions I have ever struggled with in my life. I honestly have no idea what to feel. Top it all off with huge changes in my companionship that I didn't expect, 2 more missionaries in my district that area actually living in my house, and it's just a disaster for my feelings right now. I sound like an emotional wreck, but this mission has been the most life changing thing I could ever go through. For the last 2 years I have tried to worry about so many other people, I have gotten used to the changes, to study, to missionary work, to teaching, the whole 9 yards, and to think that it's all over... I thought I would kind of smile inside. It actually hurts. A lot.

I don't know what to write. I'll try to get some more out next week. Just know that I am doing well, it's just a lot of emotions that a departing missionary isn't really ready for. Today I received my travel plans and my spiritual experience sheet and it's just all become a reality. Whenever you have the opportunity to serve the Lord, take advantage of every second. Life changes really fast, and when the time is over, it's over.

I know that I am serving the Lord, and that He accepts the sacrifices I have made, but He hasn't finished with me yet. I have 44 more days which I can dedicate to the Lord, and I will do everything I can to invite others to come unto Christ, because they must hear my voice.

Love,

Elder Andrew Anderson LaPray